Pack your finery

I like my feet. Not physiclly, of course. In fact, they’re too big and a bit pale. Which is probably why I overindulge them in positive discrimination and dress them up in the nicest shoes I can afford. Last month, I bought my ugly feet a pair of beautiful Grenson shoes. They’re handmade, traditional British shoes and when I walk, they make the most beautiful sound in my little world. I’m also saving up for a pair of Jimmy Choo paisley-embroidered velvet slippers – in other words, they’re only for wearing indoors. The only issue is that the last time I checked, the price tag was dangling on the wrong side of €500. I know I can’t afford that, so I will probably go for a pair of Church’s slippers. A third of the price, but hopefully not half the fun. It’s not just my feet that have a nice wardrobe. I like to dress up for any occasion. Mind you, it’s not a starched, Debrett’s situation, but if an occasion calls for suit and tie, then suit and tie it is. And I don’t like shirts that come in those vague S, M, L sizes – it’s proper inches and double cuffs for me. My 32 ties are all in woven silk – they’re not very expensive and last a lifetime (except for number 33, which I mistakenly...