‘The most scenic short drive in the US’

It’s easy to get lost on Lookout Mountain, so you have to constantly be on the lookout for a bandy-legged man to ask the way. You can always trust a bandy man down south; he’s usually a local and knows where places are or, at least, once were. We were trying to find the Chanticleer Inn, which according to our maps, was in Tennessee and Alabama. And probably Georgia too. We spotted a suitably bow-legged man who was hobbling down the sidewalk like a steer with a split hoof. We pulled over and rolled down the window of our  rental car, with the Florida – The Sunshine State plates. He immediately recognised us as one of his. We said ‘Howdy’. He tipped his hat and we asked him the way to a hotel. He thought a while and then thought some more, to which invisible tumbleweeds began to roll past him. Then he decided to answer. “You know Oberon?” he asked. Our jaws dropped. “How about Peter Pan? And Cinderella?” Our Sat Nav lady clearly didn’t, so why should we? She had been struck mute by Lookout Mountain. It is a very disorientating part of the world and you can lose an hour by just crossing the street or just by turning right. Eastern time suddenly becomes central if you don’t know...